


Why Won’t You Leave Me Alone?

by coldnightsandcoffee



Category: Shadow and Bone (TV), The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alarkling - Freeform, Darklina - Freeform, F/M, Fluff without Plot, Haunting, One Shot, tender moments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 13:36:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29610222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coldnightsandcoffee/pseuds/coldnightsandcoffee
Summary: I'm back again with my rewrites of certain scenes that I wish were more fleshed out. Here is another one, a closer look at when the Darkling haunts Alina in the Little Palace.----"Why have you come?" I said. I was unafraid. He was just a vision after all."I had to see you," he said quietly. Then he turned his eyes on me. My breath hitched in my throat. Even as a vision, he was able to affect me so. My chest tightened. I turned to the documents in front me, breaking eye contact.---
Relationships: The Darkling | Aleksander Morozova & Alina Starkov, The Darkling | Aleksander Morozova/Alina Starkov
Comments: 12
Kudos: 91
Collections: Grisha Trilogy





	Why Won’t You Leave Me Alone?

The Darkling appeared to me almost every day, usually in his chambers or the aisles of the library, sometimes in the war room during council meetings or as I walked back from the Grand Palace at dusk.

One particular night, I was bent over my desk poring over reports. I didn't know leading the Grisha in war involved that much paperwork. I adjusted my lamp as I tried to understand the texts in front of me, but in my tired state, the words started blending into each other unintelligibly. I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair. Somewhere off in the distance, I heard faint voices speaking, muffled by the walls. In the deep dark of the Darkling's bedchambers, I felt detached from everything. I cracked my eyes open, just a bit. The lamp's flickering light threw the carved walls into gentle relief, the woods-like decoration seemingly coming to life. For a moment I was transported, imagining myself outside surrounded by trees, the wide expanse of the night sky overhead. There is danger here. There is also a hushed stillness, the taut bowstring of expectation.

The hair at my nape prickled, and I knew that I am no longer alone.

I caught his dark form just at the edge of my vision, to my right. I looked at him fully. He is quiet, watching the walls as I have watched them earlier. Dark hair fell over his eyes and cascaded beautifully towards his nape. His mouth remained expressionless, but his eyes watched the shadows, as if in remembrance. 

"Why have you come?" I said. I was unafraid. He was just a vision after all. 

"I had to see you," he said quietly. Then he turned his eyes on me. My breath hitched in my throat. Even as a vision, he was able to affect me so. My chest tightened. I turned to the documents in front me, breaking eye contact.

“Why won’t you leave me alone?” I whispered. I felt, rather than saw, him hovering closer to me, disappearing completely from view. Behind me, this much close to me, I felt his presence in my very bones. 

Long minutes passed. I didn’t think he would answer. Then I felt his hand on my shoulder, warm. Unbidden, his scent came to my memory. I took a shameful whiff and found that I can actually smell him, cold as winter, heady as the woods. He took his hand away.

“Then I’d be alone, too,” he said. 

Inside me, something broke, just a little. I caught sight of him again, walking away from me. Walking towards his bed. I stopped breathing. He sat on it, then turned to me. 

"The hour is late. Rest." He patted the space beside him. 

"I'm not yet finished," I said. I turned towards one of the pages again, my mind far, far away from its contents. 

"Alina." There was a finality to his tone that brooked no defiance. How does he do it? Even as a vision, I felt myself being pulled intensely to him. I took a deep breath, dropped the papers on the desk, and stood up. Seeing me move towards him, he smiled. It was a smile tinged with something like sadness, but breathtaking nonetheless. He reached a hand out to me, and I took it. He whispered a kiss into my knuckles. "Sol Koroleva," he said, in a tone of reverence. I didn't know what to do. Then he pulled me towards him, to sit by his side, two small points in a vast sea of black silken sheets. We were so close his thigh was touching mine.

"Rest," he repeated, guiding my head to lean on his shoulder. I pressed against him, in spite of myself, and closed my eyes. The day was indeed long, and both my mind and bones were weary. This felt safe, in the way one feels safe inside a lighthouse during a storm, while the ocean raged all around. His hand is warm against my cheek, holding me close. "Tell me about your day."

I pulled my thoughts away from how his clothes felt against my skin. "It was... a lot of work. Being you. I had no idea."

He chuckled quietly, and I had to smile at the sound. "Everyone wants to lead until they actually had to lead," he said. "It's not all glamour and getting to tell people what to do. Sometimes it's the opposite of that."

"Like herding cats," I said.

"Indeed." He laughed, then caressed my cheek briefly. 

_I wish this was real._ The thought came unbidden, and it startled me. I looked up at him, afraid he could hear my thoughts. But he gave no indication that he did. 

"And like cats, people are quite hard to compel to do things. Just do what I do."

"Give them my most withering glare?"

He laughed again, then pulled me down to lie with him on the bed. I stopped breathing. "You think so little of me," he said, his eyes twinkling.

I adjusted my body so my head was resting against one his pillows, giving myself a chance to put a little distance between us. It was all for nothing though. He also made himself comfortable, then flung an arm around me, gathering me close. I was pressed so close to him his breath was warming my forehead.

"I hardly think of you at all," I lie.

"Is that so?" He pulled away briefly so he can look into my eyes. His mouth curved into a smile, as if my denial was the most delicious thing. "Indeed," he said, almost half to himself, holding me close again. He pressed a kiss on the top of my head.

I scowled. "Why do you need to be so self-indulgent?"

"Why do you need to be self-denying?" 

"Because it is the right thing to do." Even as I said this, I clung to him. 

"Then tell me this, Alina. How do you feel now?" He tilted my chin up so I was looking into his eyes. With infinite tenderness, he brushed his lips against my forehead, then down to the bridge of my nose. I held myself still. Then his mouth moved downwards, to slide over my lips. He kissed me gently, seeking nothing, wanting nothing. He kissed me for a long while. Then, in a sigh of surrender, I kissed him back. My arms wound around his neck. Our kiss deepened. It was frightening how much I wanted to drink in all of him, how much I wanted to take everything he has to give. After a while, he broke off the kiss. His breath was ragged, his heartbeat fast. My cheeks flushed with shame, knowing that I already gave him my answer. He held me close to him again, my face burrowed in the nook of his shoulder.

"Why won’t you leave me alone?” I asked again, voice muffled against his skin.

He didn't answer me for some time. I thought he had fallen asleep. Then his fingers caressed the small of my back. 

“Because you didn't want to be alone." 

And I knew he was right.

\---

In the morning, I woke up to an indentation on my pillow of where his head had lain. I reached out to touch it. There was a lingering echo of warmth, fading in the morning cold. It still has his scent. I took a good long look at it. Then I got up and went about my day.

**Author's Note:**

> Liked it? Please don't forget to leave kudos and comments!


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